Communicating skills

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4 March 2024

This is an interesting topic, and when it is understood, it can help explain many challenges in our conversations, particularly within intimate relationships. 

So often, arguments with partners can be far more heated than they need to be, and this is down to different unconscious communication styles. It is like we are on different radio frequencies or even speaking a foreign language. 

There are two styles for speaking and two styles for listening, and it is invaluable to understand the differences. Everyone generally falls into one category, although this is not set in stone. We can all listen and speak in either style at different times, although generally, we each have a tendency towards one.

When someone does not understand what you are saying, then arguments and misunderstandings occur. The response can be that people feel unheard, undervalued, unloved, uncared for, when often it is just a simple difference in communication styles. 

When you understand these two different styles, then we can be flexible, learn to talk or listen to support a better conversation. Sometimes we might need to change how we say something or appreciate what the other is saying.

We will look at the two types of styles in the next blog, hopefully these can help you have a greater understanding.

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